There might be – not very likely, though – some pictures on fire works tomorrow. However, since it will be my b-day my mum will kill me if I’m not around the whole day! Tonight’s a big night, I guess. At least it feels like it should be a big step in life, turning 18, but I’m actually scared instead. It feels insecure to leave the safeness of childhood behind and step out to face the unknown world of adults.
Hah, I’m so not ready for it! At least I made the chocolate balls for tomorrow, next step is to be able to make dinner which means something else but pancakes or potatoes and fish sticks! I feel so retarded because I’m not able to cook dishes that means I’ll have to use the oven. I’m scared to death by it… Well, let’s just say that I may face that when I move out!
I’ve finished Eclipse so now I’m reading Breaking Dawn, the fourth and last Twilight book. It started off pretty good but now it’s kind of… weird. Edward is destroying pillows by biting them and he just recently broke Carlisle’s and Esme’s bed during his and Bella’s honeymoon. And well… now Bella is pregnant. Weird? WIERD! And the little devilish thing inside of her is killing her but ”No! I’m keeping it!” and Carlisle won’t listen to Edward because both Rosalie and Esme is supporting Bella. GOOD GOD! What is going on!?
It is amazing what things around you are able to improve your mood in such ways as it sometimes does, both positively and negatively. Books are one thing, people is antother. But sometimes things go all wrong eventhough your surrounding isn’t bothering you. That is when you realize that there are times when you have to deal with yourself. That’s hard. Really hard. Sometimes unbearable.
I’ve finished the second Twilight book by now – New Moon. I’m so exited about Eclipse!! However I must do my psycology project for Thursday, wooooh that’s going to be unbearable! And I just can’t stop thinking of the book.
Nevertheless, the book isn’t my only distraction. There’s something else. Someone else. And that someone is all too often distracting me. The problem is that… I do not mind.
Just leave me alone, don’t ask me why, just let me cry my tears that I know is the thing aching in me from inside. Piano is such a lovely instrument. Thanx, Alex. It kind of healed a bit of my soul.
There are moments when you wish you could disappear and turn into someone else,
Moments when you wish that things would have been different,
When you are ready to give up, when you want to cry but can’t find any tears,
There are moments when you feel like your world is falling apart,
When you feel like lying down and face whatever comes next,
There are moments when you feel okay,
Moments when you feel quite good, when you feel love,
There are moments you’ll never forget.
However, no moment is everlasting,
Take care of what you are given,
Most of us don’t,
Before it is too late.
I think…
Listen to Bella’s Lullaby. It is so beautiful. A good moment.
I’ve always wanted to write my own book, a novel filled with mysteries, love, friendship and magic. I’ve come to a point where I’m sure that this is my biggest dream right now. However, it is hard – very hard – to come up with any ideas. Well, of course I do come up with some ideas, it is just that they aren’t good enough. It’s hard wanting something so badly, but at the same time always being reminded of your lack of… ability.
My first story is kind of an fiction/detective novel. It is about a man ”X” who is trying to track down a murderer, which steals his victims souls by marking them. ”X” is helped by his friend, who is a female ghost which possesses knowledge of the spiritual world. Kind of…
The second I haven’t written very much on, but it is to be a fantasy novel. The backside would say something like this: jane is sent to a fantasy land beyond the Seven Seas. She has been given the mission of finding an answer to the ageless question – what is the purpose of life?
There are more, but they aren’t any good and my biggest problem is that I can’t find any good endings to my ideas. As a writer you have to know the beginning, middle AND the end of your story, right?
Without any expectations, and having in mind that I must read this other book in English B, I went to the book store to buy the second Twilight book. To my happiness and surprise – there it was! It lay there, waiting for me, all shiny and everything. I was super happy about it and did not mind that I missed the tran, which would take me home, by a few seconds. My joy is not describable! VICTORY!!!! It seems like there is a God, after all.
Okay so I’m in a crazy adrenaline rush right now. Dad and I went to see the Twilight film. Five stars, no questions! Even though the manuscript did not follow the book all the time the actors were terrific on giving life to their characters. I am now officially cured! I’ve gone from crushing on old actors – like Jack Davenport, Johnny Depp, etc. – and I now have a crush on Robert Pattinson. Okay, so I had that in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire when he played Cedric but now I am absolutely positive that I’m in love with him!
OH MY GOD! Will I ever find a guy like that? You know; charming, caring, letting me know that he’d die for me? Nope, probably not, my requests are too high. Though, I’ll never stop dreaming. People asks questions about ”What’s the purpose of life?”
All I ask is: ”Is there anybody out there?”
PS. Thanks Dad for going with me. It must have felt quite embarassing to go and watch a film and being surrounded by lovesick girls (although there was one older quy.) But thanks Dad, I appreciated it!
Yesterday, M and I planned to get started on her very first blog theme since she is about to install WordPress. It is an honour, I must say, to be the one who creates it. We’ve got some ideas and I’m sure it will be great once we’re ready!
There aren’t any other plans for today really… Maybe I’ll go to the cinema on my own…
Jag sprang och letade efter Twilightboken efter skolan. Den verkade inte finnas någonstans och jag började bli desperat. Så kom jag till Pocket Shop och där fanns den kvar! Den kostade 109kr där, den dyraste pocketboken jag köpt, men jag har börjat läsa och än så länge är den värd vartenda öre!
Det är ju helt fantastiskt vad som kan hända om man råkar glömma nycklarna hemma! Jag slutade 12.00 idag, letade i en timma efter twilight på stan, hittade den slutligen, kom hem, var utelåst. Hade inte mobilen med mig heller. Hör att grannarna är hemma, men vill inte störa, känner inte dem så bra. Tar fram datorn för att se vad klockan är och upptäcker att internet fungerar, pappa har ju bredbandet i sitt rum och signalen når ut! Loggar in på msn och försöker få tag i mamma som, vad jag vet, inte har några lektioner på tisdagar. Ingen svarar så jag hittar hennes jobbadress genom hemsidan. Mejlar och då loggar hon in på msn och halelulja – hon kommer hem och öppnar!! Älskade mamma! <3
Jag skall klippa mig vid fyra, men först skall jag skriva klart min novell.
Jag sprang och letade efter Twilightboken efter skolan. Den verkade inte finnas någonstans och jag började bli desperat. Så kom jag till Pocket Shop och där fanns den kvar! Den kostade 109kr där, den dyraste pocketboken jag köpt, men jag har börjat läsa och än så länge är den värd vartenda öre!
Jag var ju hos frissan också, så här ser jag ut i håret nu! 
